There are so many things in my life that I know are a definite blessing. I haven't figured out why I deserve them, or how it happened...but I know that they only came about because of the Lord's blessing. And as I was struggling this week with some things, He continually kept shwoing me how blessed I am in the friendships I have....friends would say things to me, completely out of the blue, that I would instantly think...wow, thank you Jesus for that reminder, thank you for these people in my life, for this chance I've had to spend this time building those relationships. For keeping other things out of the way, so that even as I am working and going to school, there is time for these friends. So many different things that can come across as "not ideal" have led to the strong friendships I have. Even now, as bored as I have been at work in the last few months, it has been such a blessing because it has allowed me to accomplish so much school work during the day, so that I had time to spend with my friends. I know that this is exactly where I am supposed to be, and that He has kept so many things out of my life, that maybe I would choose to have, so that I can have this time--just being a college student...well, sort of :)
He is continually looking out for me, blessing me and providing for me. Yet there are so many times in my life when I am working on something or making a choice or worrying about what the outcome will be...when I realize, I never once prayed about it. I don't ask Him to be there, or to help me...I don't invite him along. And its this weird contradiction in my head...I can't figure out why I don't remember to talk to him about it beforehand, when as the question unfolds I know without a doubt that it is all Him. There is never any question in my mind as to whether or not the answer comes from Him. It is Him alone that could have made that happen, or could have calmed my irrational fears, or could have given me the patience to wait for His timing. Thankfully He walks with me even when I forget to ask him, but I want to do better. So, here's to a new season...of invitations!